The Ski Pole Ethic

One Month in Bonn...

Germans have a love affair with ski poles. Every Saturday, at train stations all across Germany, large groups of middle-aged Germans gather together to embark on outdoor adventures. Without fail, they are equipped with hiking boots, zip-off waterproof pants, day packs, and ski poles. Always the ski poles.

The use of ski poles in Germany is not just confined to weekend hiking trips however. People walk their dogs with ski poles. Carry home groceries with ski poles. Ride their bikes, you guessed it, with ski poles.

Initially I regarded this practice as overly cautious, heinously over prepared, and more than a little silly. But, when in Bonn...

While I have yet to adopt the ski pole fetish, I have adopted a rather ski pole-esk philosophy on various aspects of my life here in Germany. I'll call it the ski pole ethic for lack of a better term. After all, it can't hurt to be overly cautious and uber prepared when setting the foundation for a new life in a new country.

Example #1: Friends. 

I have become a people collector. The first few weeks in Germany, I felt so isolated and alone that the sight of groups of people laughing together made me weepy (see previous post). I've never been one to wallow in misery (for long) about things I could not change however, so I've adopted the ski pole ethic to finding friends and am becoming overly prepared.

I've turned down no invitation, let no social gathering go unattended, and doggedly pursued promising people to interview for "friend" status. During coffee breaks, or lunch with likely people, I cautiously probe, ask questions, illicit conversations and interview (covertly) said person to be my friend. These things take time however, and shared experience, and usually alcohol, but I am quickly amassing an international coven of good people that may fit the bill. I do wonder however, when the time comes, how to confirm their friend status. Life is not so easy as Facebook. I think I will just revert to kindergarden and simply ask "Will you be my friend?" and hand them a lollipop. That will surely work.

Example #2: Work. 

After two weeks of basically creating my own induction course to the UN, including recommended people to shadow and courses of self-study, something had to give. No one was telling me what to do or what was expected of me. I was left to my own devices all day everyday while my teammates and boss buzzed around me singing the busy-bee song. Time to extend those ski poles. I looked at what was being done by others on my team, compared that to the key objectives outlined by the Board, and filled the gaps. I wrote my own work plan with objectives, tasks, and time lines and presented it to my boss on Friday of week two. He seemed a bit flabbergasted but approved the plan, and now I get to make honey too ;)

Example #3: Language. 

I WILL learn German. Even though everyone here speaks English and the grammar rules are ridiculous. Even though there are18 ways to say the word "the" and a single word can be as long as the Emancipation Proclamation, I WILL adopt the ski pole ethic and learn German. You just never know when it might come in handy. In regards to other languages, I've spoken more Spanish here than I have since leaving Mexico in 1998. Portuguese is also widely spoken and my next-door neighbor is Japanese. I find myself speaking tidbits of five languages on a daily basis, and love every moment of it, even if it does make me forget English. Yesterday, while on a day trip with a Columbian woman, it took me three hours to remember what we call the wire stir thing we use to scramble eggs. It's a wire whisk. In case you were wondering.

Example #4: Life. 

Last weekend, a very dear friend of a very dear friend, drowned while rescuing her son from a riptide near their new home in Costa Rica. She was an amazing woman who never said "I can't" and lived life with an unmatched fervor, passion, and spark. She accomplished more in her short life than most do in a full lifetime and leaves behind two young sons, a husband, and swarms of friends. My, and her, dear friend said it best when she said "She died as she lived; loving fiercely." I do not yet know how to incorporate the lessons of this tragic event. I do know however, that I will never again miss the chance to say  I love you to those I care about, I will forgive faster, and I will give daily appreciation to those who grace my life.

You can never be too prepared.